Addressing family conflict when caring for an ailing parent. When faced with care for a frail relative, ideally we want to partner with our siblings for the best support. This does not always go smoothly due to family conflict. The care for an aging parent can put a strain on sibling relationships. I have heard client's children tell me that they do not know if they will remain in contact with other family members after the parent passes, because the disagreements have been so dramatic. Some careful thought and planning can prevent or lessen this stress. First, what are the underlying causes of conflict: Siblings [...]

What should you have ready in case of a medical event for you or someone that you care for? We never plan on needing emergency services, but we can plan on having some information ready in case of emergency. When you or someone in your family requires emergency care, it may be difficult or impossible to have clear information under the stress of the moment. Some advanced preparation can be a big help. A few documents that you have prepared ahead of time, and have made copies of that you can take with you or direct a caregiver to bring to the hospital, will help [...]

I saw this posted on the door of a hospital I was in today and asked for a copy. I am sorry I cannot quote the source. I think it is very well said, simple and to the point, with excellent tips, so I am copying it here. Alzheimer's Communication Never argue, instead agree Never reason, instead divert Never shame, instead distract Never lecture, instead reassure Never say “remember” instead, reminisce Never say “I told you”, instead repeat / regroup Never say “You can't”, instead do what they can Never command / demand, instead ask, model Never condescend, instead encourage Never force, instead reinforce

What difference does the service of Care Management make to an older adult and their family A care manager is a member of the team who is experienced and knowledgeable about issues that elders face as they age and the services that can help them. For mom to remain at home and safe, and healthy, that means a care manager to be there for her when her family lives a distance away. For dad who is socially isolated and depressed, it means getting him involved in activities with other people. For a family who is fighting with each other about care for mom and dad, [...]

I had an experience with a client recently that I would like to share. I went to her primary care physician appointment with her. She has been having some medical problems, and has gone for some tests to determine cause and treatment. I have been to 3 prior appointments to this doctor with this client. Some background: My client moved into an assisted living facility about 1 years ago. It was not an easy transition for her to go from living on her own in the community to a group living environment. She would talk with me throughout the year about struggling with things like, [...]

Use the 4 box system to clean out your house Box 1: Keep in the family – important photos, heirlooms, documents that you want passed onto other family members. Make sure they store them well, scan them into the computer to keep as a record there. It may be best to give these items to that family member who will inherit them now, so that they don't get thrown out by accident during the move. Box 2: Move with me – this could be items like artwork that you will put up in new home. Box 3: Appraisal / Sell – those items that you [...]